It really is hard to make friends in the adult world. Sure, you’ve got your work buddies and that cool guy/gal that you chum with during your hobby activity (tennis, pottery, French class, whatever) and maybe even a neighbour or two; but nothing like the real friends you may have had at various stages throughout your academic life.
Or….not. I only have one friend from my school-age that is still my friend. And she has always lived 3 hours away, so I’ve been pretty much friendless for most of my life.
But I am here to offer words of hope. All is not lost.
I want to tell you my story of how I met someone who I think I will be friends with for the rest of my life. Let’s call her Munchkin.
Oddly enough, I met her online. But not through one of those friend services like meetup.com or anything (though those are valuable resources!). I met her through Craigslist.
Yup. I said it. Craigslist.
That wonderful mishmash of slightly shady ads, great deals and jerks, with a small smattering of decent people thrown in.
Craigslist is both good and bad. If you read my blog you’ll see that I’ve been burned by it several times. But there is always some good to balance out the bad.
Munchkin was one of those good things.
Here’s how it began…
Once upon a time I was lonely. I decided to check out the Strictly Platonic section of Craigslist once again to see if there was anyone interesting on there. Usually its a bunch of people looking for dates or a quick fuck (I don’t understand why they just can’t post the in appropriate sections! Sheesh!) but once in a while there was a real person behind those ads, looking for another person to make a connection with.
I had done this before and even met with some of the girls looking for friends, but none of us really hit it off. A few coffees here, a movie there and then the emails and Facebook pokes would peter off.
But then I saw it: A call-out to all the ladies to start a girl’s group where we could hang out and do our nails and just have fun together. It sounded sort of interesting and I didn’t have anything to lose, so I replied.
I don’t have the original post anymore, but I DO have the email that I replied with:
“Hey, I saw your posting on CL about getting group of gals together for friendship and I thought it was a great idea!
You’re so right about guys having it easier… for me I find making new friends is as awkward as dating these days! What happened to the simpler ways of our childhood?
Anyhoodle… My name is G, I’m 20-something and live in TO. I work in advertising which is sort of interesting I guess. I have some friends but not a whole ton (otherwise why would I be looking, right?) and I’d really like to meet some new girls and see if we click.
I think I’m pretty openminded, and I like trying new things. Lately I’ve been trying to get my creative juices flowing (I used to be a little artzy phartzy when I was younger) and have been taking silversmithing classes and will also be taking some clay/pottery classes in the summer. I’ve been trying to learn to cook, too.
In the meantime, I practice Shaolin Kung Fu a couple of times a week which is really fun…except that I am the only girl and the guys are all married! ugh! I looooooove shopping as well, but have been abstaining lately as I am heading to Vegas over Easter and I need to save money… so I can shop there! haha
Umm, well there is lots more that I could say but the email would be far too long! Feel free to look me up on Facebook or write back and let me know if you’re going to go ahead with your little shindig!” (March 2009)
Not long after, Munchkin wrote back to me, and quickly added me to her MSN.
Finally, I have a chance to be-friendly with someone who can cover my ass! Kung fu is great to learn for a girl. So way to go! I find that fascinating!
So far, I have been able to tally many interesting girls, all with very different personalities. I am confident that if you don’t hit it off with me, you’ll be hitting it off with another girl…. such was the premise for this get together. But obviously, we all have one thing in common: We love to meet new people, which means we’re open-minded and easy-going. And this is a great start!
A little about me… (a totally verbose description of her interests, lol)
I had this idea of the posting one night when I realized I had no one to go to this concert with! I have friends, but our interests can be a little off sometimes and it’s hard to get a group going when everyone is scattered all around the outskirts of the city. Working downtown, I want to be able to get off work, walk up to Queen street and grab a beer without wondering how long I have to wait until my friend makes it in from Mississauga or if she’s going to make it at all… catch my drift?
To be honest, I’m really happy with the kinds of responses I have been getting. Although everyone seems very different, everyone seems down to earth and open minded. Once the warm weather sets in and I get a good group of girls going, I will be sending out a group invitation through Facebook so that everyone can feel comfortable before the big night. If you have any suggestions please feel free!
Have a great day!