Category Archives: drama

Follow Up: Dealing with an Alcoholic Guest

Last week I frantically posted about having a bed & breakfast guest that came to my place drunk and proceeded to steal my Jameson whiskey and drink it.

Here’s what happened.

After writing the post, I tried to get some sleep. Despite my confidence in self-defense and smart thinking, I was definitely uneasy. I locked myself in and made sure I knew where all my weapons were and ran through in my head what I would do if he tried to get in and go for the booze.

Lucky for me, he was passed out in the guest room for the whole night.

In the morning before work I spoke with him about the night before. By this point he was sober and sincerely sorry about his behavior. He apologized profusely.

I told him that I wanted to be reimbursed for the bottle he opened (Jameson ain’t cheap, my friends!) and he agreed and said he would also make it up to me.

I left for work (after locking my door of course) and felt a little better. I was still a little worried about the whole situation and whether to let him stay or not and decided to evaluate things when I got home.

Later that night, Mr. Singapore came home and apologized to me again, presenting me with a new bottle of Jameson, flowers and a bottle of wine for my troubles. Very nice! I tried not to let things get too awkward because I knew he was trying to make amends so I kept up a steady stream of chatter to smooth things over.

My roommate and I decided he could stay for the rest of the week as long as he stayed clean. He did the responsible thing and attended local AA meetings and called his wife, so I felt ok about this.

However I realize just how lucky things were for us. I think in the future I need to evaluate guests more closely and am going to stick to couples and female guests only. My parents were pretty horrified when I told them this story.

It was a good lesson learned for sure, and made me think about things a lot more. I will still use the Airbnb service for future bookings (they answered my panicked email quickly and had my back on any decision I made) but I will definitely be more careful!

Dealing with an Alcoholic Guest

So I knew this day would come… the day in which we got a questionable booking from Airbnb.com.

This week we are hosting a 44 year old business man who flew in from Singapore to visit his family in the GTA.

I wasn’t around to receive him, but my roommate was. I was out at an event and came home to her frantically miming me to check my phone messages.

Turns out the guy is an alcoholic and showed up drunk at our door, which made my roomie quite uncomfortable. By the time I got home she assured me that she was ok with this guy and that he could stay, but after what just happened I am not so sure.

We all talked a little and he seems like a nice but very troubled man. I feel for him, I do.

But I wasn’t sure how to feel when I discovered that the Jameson whiskey my best friend gave me for xmas yesterday went missing while I was in my room.

Turns out Mr. Singapore was hiding in the bathroom with the light off, drinking my whiskey.

NOT COOL.

Thank goodness my iron spine has been growing back lately!

I confronted him and retrieved my whiskey and an apology. I discussed with him that that is completely unacceptable and that that kind of behaviour is not allowed here. I told him that instead of stealing our booze he should reach out and talk to one of us if he has the urge. Roomie is already going to an AA meeting with him tomorrow to help support him.

I also told him that I was taking all our booze to my office and/or locking it up so he couldn’t get at it. I told him that we had no other drugs or cigarettes in our home either. I know from experience that you just can’t trust an alcoholic of this degree. (Not knocking all alkies, but this guy is pretty bad if he can’t control himself at a stranger’s home)

Roomie and I rushed around while he was out for a smoke, gathering up all of our booze. Shit son, I have a LOT! Plus I still had wine left over from my party yesterday… I probably have over 30 bottles of alcohol in my bedroom right now.

I have a lock on my door (and am currently locked in my room for the night) and I really hope he doesn’t know how to pick those little door knob locks because the deadbolt on my door isn’t working right now.

I don’t really know what to do with this situation. I feel bad for the guy and want to help him while he’s here, but I also don’t want my things stolen from me or rifled through. I don’t feel endangered by him, it’s just how he took my booze that bothered me.

What would you do in this situation?

Surgery Payment Problems

Update: You can find all weight loss/Slimband-related posts under the Weight Loss category or by clicking here.

I write this post at the risk of getting a lot of flak and coming off as an entitled, ungrateful princess.

But I need to write it anyway.

Secretly, I was counting on my grandad to come through with all or most of the money for my Slimband surgery. My mom (who knows him best) was convinced that he would be generous; he’s old, has no other family has loads of money and doesn’t do anything with it. He was there at my birth.

Generous is not a word I would use to describe my grandad at this point.

I don’t know what happened. My mom and I thought that he would give at least $1000 to help me out (if not more!). His daughter was a 500lb obese woman who recently passed away. He knows what it’s like to see someone suffer due to their weight.

Instead, I got $350 from him.

My parents didn’t even call to tell me because they didn’t know how to process this. We’re stunned.

I mean, don’t get me wrong; I respect the fact that it is his money and his choice, and I am grateful for anything that he is willing to give me… but at the same time I’m just stunned that the amount is so low, when he has so many reasons to give more. I can’t fathom his reasoning. Personally I suppose I am more of the helping-mind, I am always trying to help others, make or give them things. Especially family, I would go to the ends of the world for them. If this were me, I would have given a substantial amount to my family member.

I’m so conflicted. I’m happy for the $350 but not, you know what I mean? I don’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth.

I was just really expecting more (whether that was right or wrong to do so). $350 isn’t even a drop in the bucket when I’m looking at $16,000.

So now I’ve got to find another way to pay for this procedure. I’ve already made a $3000 non-refundable deposit so I’m committed now.

I think I can afford another $3000, and in light of the grandad situation, my parents have decided to give me $3000 also. So I only need about $6600 more to cover it all.

I have the option of borrowing from my granny, but (what is up with rich old people? Are they all miserly like my family?!?!) I would have to pay her interest. Can you believe that?

So now I’m off trying to research interest rates for personal loans. I’ll take that info and negotiate with my grandmother and try and get a better rate. Like a bank. Not like family.

How sad, and cold.

I seriously think my larger family is fucked up when it comes to money. We know a lot about it but our attitudes are bizarre; where is the balanced, happy medium in life???

The French Experience (Ooh La La Explained)

So, what’s the deal with my juicy and cryptic post about the handsome French men?

Well, it was an interesting day for sure! I guess I’ll start at the top although I warn you: there’s a good chance this post will become both ranty and gooey.

The story goes like this…

I received a booking request from AirBnB for my extra room from one of the guys. Turns out he and his business partner (who also happens to be his best childhood friend) are coming to town from Montreal for some business in advertising. Way cool! We all work in the industry, that should give us something to talk about!

I saw a crappy photo of him before he booked and it didn’t look very attractive; but I’m not really looking to get with most of my guests anyway so what did it matter, right?

HA! When he and his buddy walked in the door I was stopped in my tracks—he was HOT! Both were good looking but I had my eye on one in particular, let’s call him Guy 1 and the other Guy 2.

I took them upstairs to get them settled and there was definite chemistry between the three of us, it was like we all had known each other for a while. They found out that I could speak (limited) French and were even warmer. We traded stories about our travels, business and our dogs and I gave them some recommendations on where to eat that night – they were just looking for a pub to relax in and watch the game.

At this point my roomie hadn’t even come out to greet them yet (manners, anyone? This is definitely a beef I have, I do 100% of the work for AirBnB yet she gets half the money. This is going to change.)

First Strike

Guy 2 headed downstairs to get ready to head out (or something like that). Guy 1 stayed upstairs with me to give me one of his business cards and we ended up chatting for a while longer. I could hear that roomie finally came out of her room and was chatting with Guy 2. Suddenly she pops up the stairs in her jacket and says “come on guys!” as if she was going out with them. I’m puzzled at first because I know the guys just wanted to head out and relax alone. Roomie had also said she would be doing work in her room all night.

Turns out she had invited herself out to dinner with them. I had a couple of thoughts:

  1. How RUDE! You don’t just invite yourself out with tired guests! Especially when you don’t even have the maturity to greet them until you discover that they’re good-looking.  She saw they were hot and wanted in. The sad part is that she was already seeing someone, why does she have to try and sleep with every hot guy she sees?
  2. I would have asked to join them myself except that I was being a good host and allowing them their privacy. When people get to their destination after a long trip, most just want to relax and do their own thing for a bit.
  3. I figured if they wanted us to join them they would ask.
  4. Roomie was incredibly rude. Inviting yourself to someone else’s party is one thing, but then she didn’t even have the decency to invite me, her “partner” that did all the work. She was just going to leave me sitting at home, cleaning up after everyone. Thanks.

Well, at least I managed to be mature about the whole thing. I played it up and did an overly dramatic “awww, can I come??” and Guy 1 asked me to join them. Ha. Looks like I was right about thought number 3.

So we headed out into the frigid, pouring rain. Once again my roomie butted in and decided to change where everyone was going. A simple pub was not fancy enough, oh no! We had to go to hipster central so she could show off. After a slight hesitation the guys were game and I didn’t really care so off we went to the Ossington strip. So much for the pub they were looking for. It always has to be about roomie and what she wants, never anyone else.

The Good Stuff

The place we wanted to go to was too crowded so we headed across the street “to have drinks while we waited”. Roomie’s suggestion, of course. Me and the guys didn’t want to do that because we were all on budgets. Luckily male force made a showing and they opted for the burger place right beside it instead. Thank goodness!

Anyway, dinner was great. Conversation and beer was flowing and the chemistry was fantastic. I personally felt really good because I knew I was hitting it off with these guys, and they were really interesting! Since I’m somewhat of an introvert, it’s always a WIN when my charm turns on and people get to see me in action! I felt good about myself and the situation.

Both of the guys were really great to talk with. We shared not only business, but a lot of personal interests too, even volunteering and history! They felt so comfortable around me they even lapsed into French a couple of times. (I know this is wrong but I felt good that roomie had no idea what was going on for once and that she felt left out for a change.)

Both boys wanted to exchange information with me and we’re planning some future visits in Montreal and TO if all goes well. Squee! This is the giggly part 😉

The Reveal

So I was feeling great. Roomie kept trying to draw all the attention back to herself the whole night, but I think the fact that she finally saw what I can be like socially (and the fact that the guys were more into me!) really threw her for a loop. Instead of coming off all cultured and educated like she wants to, she just came off sort of childish and immature, especially since we were all older than her.

I’m a little disappointed that I had to “compete” with roomie the whole night over these guys, but I am pleased with my performance. I was able to take everything in stride, offered the right kind of responses and ended the night on a positive note. Me and the guys chatted the whole ride home while roomie sat mostly quiet. The tables have turned!

Anyway, the guys eventually went home, but we have been emailing back and forth, and the cute one added me to LinkedIn and Facebook (and not my roomie)! I’m definitely considering a trip out to Montreal sometime soon so I can hang out with the cute one some more. I could even stay with him since he’s an Air BnB host, too! Oooh la la!

Self-realization

I just want to say that I know it’s wrong to feel superior to another and to be happy when they embarrass themselves or get reality shoved in their faces. But it’s also human nature. My roommate thinks that she is better than me in all areas (and during the night tried to bring me down in front of the guys “Oh, do you only have one friend?” and other sarcastic remarks) so it was nice to shove everything back in her face and come out as the winner. Too bad it had to be a contest in the first place.

It ain’t right, but it sure felt good.

Ginger’s got her groove back, y’all!

It won’t leave me alone

What does it mean when you can’t get the thought of someone out of your head? Does it mean something is wrong with you? Or right with you?

Does it signify an unhealthy obsession, or something deeper?

As much as I have tried to steel myself against it, Mr. Darcy keeps popping into my head and it’s driving me mad. Out of all the things I am dealing with right now, why does this have to pop up?

Nothing is going to happen there. So why do I keep yearning for him? Why can’t I get over this?

…and more importantly, why can’t I ever get the guy?

Roommate Update

PHEW.

As of yesterday, my roommate is totally paid up in terms of rent.

I feel SO MUCH BETTER.

It’s just a band-aid solution right now since she still doesn’t have a decent job to pay the bills, but we discussed the possibility of her moving out in the future because she is consistently living beyond her means. Thankfully she sees where I’m coming from and that I’m not trying to be mean–only realistic.

I know she’s working really hard to try and find a better job, but I still have that lingering bit of doubt.

I mean, I wouldn’t hire her based on her resume. She can’t seem to hold down a job for longer than a few months, and tends to pick short term contract stuff over anything stable. We all know that dozens of short jobs is not good for your resume!

Both myself and her employers need someone dependable and stable, and I don’t know if she can offer that to either of us. I think that’s where the problem lies. For now I’ve got some breathing room, but I kind of wish she would just give me notice and move out so I can find a proper roommate to replace her.