I’m not having a very good day so far. I went to bed furious about this stupid gem shop that I’ve been trying to get to lately. I have silversmithing on Friday and need a stone. This is the only place to get it, but they have shitty hours, only 10-6 and I work til 5.

So I’ve hauled ass FOUR times this week to get there before 6 only to find them closed EACH TIME!

The kicker is that I even called the woman yesterday and asked her to make sure to stay until the proper 6pm closing time because I would be there at 5:30. The fucker left! She promised she would be there and she fucking LEFT! Before 5:15 because I even called! I went anyway, trying to give her the benefit of the doubt, but she WASN’T THERE! I went all the way there to find an empty shop!

I am so fucking furious with the people that run this place. There are a lot of details I’m leaving out of this because it would take me hours to type up everything, but I have EVERY RIGHT to be FUCKING FURIOUS.

So I went to bed angry and woke up crying early this morning. Despite my dream-blocking meds, a very upsetting and emotional dream slipped through… I had a terrible dream that my dad had a heart attack and then his heart became infected and he passed away. You have no idea how intense the sadness was in this dream. It was totally in your face and I woke up crying and out of breath. That never happens.

I was so upset about this that I actually called my dad this morning to make sure he was ok. The last time I got an intense feeling like that, I “felt” like something had happened to my cat. It turns out that she was ok, but the OTHER cat ran away! So I was definitely feeling something!!! (It was when I was leaving for Vegas, my buddy Tigger ran away for the whole week I was gone! He came back but it was so unusual!)

And now it’s raining, my day is filled with stupid conference calls and there was even one scheduled from 5pm-6pm! I am fucking livid! I HAVE to go back to that shitty store today and get that stone or I’m screwed tomorrow. Now if I have to stay past 5 today it means that my only chance is to go at lunch, assuming I even have time for lunch today!

I am just so goddamned PISSED today!

Ugh. I am saddened and upset by the new LouLou “collection” for Addition-Elle that they will be unveiling shortly.

I received this in my inbox today:

Looks pretty promising, doesn’t it?

So away I click, excited that there’s going to be a shopping party in my future and in my area! They wouldn’t send me an email otherwise, right? I mean, I DO live in Toronto, basically the centre of the Canadian world. Psha.

To my surprise I am redirected to a page on the LouLou website in which I discover that all the “parties” are happening at locations in the middle of nowhere. Not a single listing for anywhere resembling the GTA. (Edit: Ok there is one in Woodbridge. Woodbridge. It hardly counts as the GTA, especially when the flagship store is in Toronto proper!)

Epic Fail #1.

So I think to myself: “Fine. Maybe they’re giving the less fashionably-fortunate a shot at the parties first. Maybe Toronto will come later” and I surf over to the AE website to see what constitutes this “collection” from LouLou.

I am all for increasing the fashion availabilities for the plus sized market. We want to be fashionable, comfortable and pretty too, you know. We deserve to have nicely made & nicely tailored outfits that we can be confident in. They should be flattering to us, but not 100% black because life is more fun in colour!

When LouLou first paired up with Addition-Elle I was tickled pink. They made us fat people a little digest-size version of LouLou for Fat People magazine. I was so happy to get mine that I actually wrote to the editor of LouLou thanking her (she was nice enough to reply back. +5 for customer satisfaction!).

Anyway…

That email they sent me up there? It looks awesome. I’m totally digging the model’s look, and I have a well-established love of the military look (yes I owned the military look before it even became cool….) So I am expecting to see some really awesome chic & sleek items that most people can wear. Hopefully no more of the crap they’re currently trying to shill (polyester & rayon tents with no lines or even sense to the designs sometimes).

I’m hoping for something comfortable and flattering. Something timeless and classic that you could love. Basically, a decent collection that LouLou would support, the way they support other straight size lines of quality.

What do I get instead?

BEHOLD: The horrors of plus-sized fashion!

EPIC FAIL Infinity+1

Ewwww! My eyes are burning! Not only are these some of the most hideous animal print twill pants I have ever seen, I strongly feel that they should be taken out to the back and put out of their misery.

How can the AE/LouLou designers possibly think these are either a) fashionable or b) flattering? Especially on a larger body. I would shudder to see these on a slim gal, but on a big one? I think my fight or flight response would kick in.

The worst part? They want $90 for them. As if!

Those are arguably the worst part of the collection, but LouLou + AE go on to disappoint further.

Behold:Oh yes. And this beauty is guaranteed to chafe, cling & make you sweat in ways you never imagined with its 90% Polyester, 10% Spandex stylings.

I know the 80′s are coming back, but did they have to break out more shitty animal print PLUS gold chain for this??? Srsly???

I know I’m going to see some naive and misguided women wearing this. I just know it. And as I walk by I will cry on the inside for them, for they know not the crime they commit. I won’t sneer or look away because I don’t want to make them feel bad. They should feel confident in their beauty. But…. *sigh* This is awful.

You can get your own chain print top to sweat and chafe in for only $70! *gag*

Everything else in the “collection” (if you can even call it that!) so far is only slightly less horrid than those two, yet still ho-hum. Nothing to write home about. Except for the jacket. I actually like that one. PRAISE JEEBUS!

I just… have no words. Addition-Elle and LouLou, how could you do so wrong by us big gals? What happened? I had such high expectations (at least of LouLou, Addition-Elle has been in a downward spiral for years) and a blinded hope that one day you would produce beautiful, flattering, comfortable and affordable clothes of value for the big girls of the world.

Instead I get the dog’s breakfast. And an invite to a party that isn’t even happening in my geographic location. Ever heard of geo-targeting?

tsk tsk. I am disappointed in you.

There’s a huge bru-ha-ha going on over in Twitterland over the top trending topic of the day, #fatpeoplearesexier.

I’ve seen some people in my feed making comments about it in a negative fashion, as if you can’t be sexy and fat at the same time, or that being fat automatically means that you can’t be healthy.

This obviously upsets me because (in case you haven’t figured it out by reading my blog)

And sexy.

And healthy.

The terms are not mutually exclusive. You can be all of the above, all at the same time.

It upsets me that people who “know” me online are making comments, forgetting the fact that fat people (and sometimes their fat friends) are reading those comments, and are being offended by this whole thing.

There is such a thing as health at every size, my friends. Just because you’re thin doesn’t mean you’re healthy OR sexy by default.

I happen to be fat, yet I take care of myself. I get regular exercise, I eat healthy and in moderation and I dress myself well, do my hair, etc. Just like everyone else.

But I’m still fat. Sure, I could do more (and I will) because I would like to be a smaller size, but as it stands, my doc thinks I’m healthy, I think I’m sexy, and so do all the guys who follow after me when I go out!

I would like to direct your attention to the following points [via Kate Harding's Shapely Prose] to help you better understand obesity, being fat, and BEING HUMAN:

1. Weight itself is not a health problem, except in the most extreme cases (i.e., being underweight or so fat you’re immobilized). In fact, fat people live longer than thin people and are more likely to survive cardiac events, and some studies have shown that fat can protect against “infections, cancer, lung disease, heart disease, osteoporosis, anemia, high blood pressure, rheumatoid arthritis and type 2 diabetes.” Yeah, you read that right: even the goddamned diabetes. Now, I’m not saying we should all go out and get fat for our health (which we wouldn’t be able to do anyway, because no one knows how to make a naturally thin person fat any more than they know how to make a naturally fat person thin; see point 4), but I’m definitely saying obesity research is turning up surprising information all the time — much of which goes ignored by the media — and people who give a damn about critical thinking would be foolish to accept the party line on fat. Just because you’ve heard over and over and over that fat! kills! doesn’t mean it’s true. It just means that people in this culture really love saying it.

2. Poor nutrition and a sedentary lifestyle do cause health problems, in people of all sizes. This is why it’s so fucking crucial to separate the concept of “obesity” from “eating crap and not exercising.” The two are simply not synonymous — not even close — and it’s not only incredibly offensive but dangerous for thin people to keep pretending that they are. There are thin people who eat crap and don’t exercise — and are thus putting their health at risk — and there are fat people who treat their bodies very well but remain fat. Really truly.

3. What’s more, those groups do not represent anomalies; no one has proven that fat people generally eat more or exercise less than thin people. Period. And believe me, they’ve tried. (Gina Kolata’s new book, Rethinking Thin, is an outstanding source for more on that point.)

4. Diets don’t work. No, really, not even if you don’t call them diets. If you want to tell me about how YOUR diet totally worked, do me a favor and wait until you’ve kept all the weight off for five years. Not one year, not four years, five years. And if you’ve kept it off for that long, congratulations. You’re literally a freak of nature.

5. Given that diets don’t work in the long-term for the vast, vast majority of people, even if obesity in and of itself were a health crisis, how the fuck would you propose we solve it?

6. Most fat people have already dieted repeatedly. And sadly, it’s likely that the dieting will cause them more health problems than the fat.

7. Human beings deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. Fat people are human beings.

8. Even fat people who are unhealthy still deserve dignity and respect. Still human beings. See how that works?

9. In any case, shaming teh fatties for being “unhealthy” doesn’t fucking help. If shame made people thin, there wouldn’t be a fat person in this country, trust me. I wish I could remember who said this, ’cause it’s one of my favorite quotes of all time: “You cannot hate people for their own good.”

10. If you scratch an article on the obesity! crisis! you will almost always find a press release from a company that’s developing a weight loss drug — or from a “research group” that’s funded by such companies.

There. Now that you’ve read that you’ve been given the opportunity to be a MUCH nicer person.

Some people think that #fatpeoplearesexier. Just to clear this up, I don’t necessarily believe that. I feel that #fatpeoplearesexy is a better descriptor.

Feel free to hash this out in the comments. You all know how I feel now. Just remember, this fat chick is watching what you write, so be smart.

Yes, I have tried it.

• Lavalife
• POF
• OkCupid
• Match
• Lemontonic
• eHarmony
• TangoWire

I just had a friend call me at 10pm asking to crash at my place. It seems she was caught in between moving in and out of an apartment. She was going to stay with her sister but her sister cancelled….

Ok I’m really pissed about this and just had a convo with another friend who doesn’t know her. It sums things up pretty well so you’ll have to suffer with a pasted convo:

Friend says:
Hey. How was your day yesterday?
Ginger says:
it was ok
im kind of pissed right now though
a friend just asked to crash at my place
she didn’t have anywhere else to go tonight, so i said yes
F says:
Damn, that sucks
G says:
i told her to get here before 11pm so i could settle her in
and i went and pulled out all the freaking stuff in the guest room, made her bed, etc
and she’s at a club downtown right now.
it was 1030 by this point after i’ve been cleaning very quietly
F says:
Ugh..
G says:
and i txt her asking her to be here soon
and she fuckin’ txts me back saying she can’t leave right now
her party is more important than a place to stay tonight!?!?!?
so she basically says she won’t be coming anymore
so pissed. i am so put out right now. i went to all that trouble at the last minute for her
and now she’s not even coming. what am i, a hotel?
i really don’t mind helping people out, but fucking follow through, eh?
F says:
I don’t blame you one bit
G says:
i just can’t believe she would ask me a big favour like that and then make me go to the trouble, then not even come!
seriously!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!eleventyone!11!!!!
F says:
So beat her with a nerf bat when you see her next
G says:
urgh
seriously, i don’t mind helping but i HATE being taken advantage of
F says:
That’s because you’re so awesome. So when you’re put out like this, you get super pissed
G says:
yeah no kidding.
i used to be such a doormat. i believe in helping others, but sometimes it makes it worse for me
now she’s changed her mind and has said she’ll come and is offering to make me breakfast
i’m not even here for breakfast
*big sigh*
i don’t know what to do
—————–

Still upset. She keeps waffling back and forth about coming, and it seems to me her glass of wine is more important than her friend that just went the extra mile for her benefit. I’m not letting her come over now.

What I really want to do later is call her and yell at her a little. Tell her that I feel really taken advantage of by her and that she needs to shape up or ship out. I like her and don’t mind helping her, but there has to be some gratitude and respect in there somewhere, and I ain’t feelin’ it.

Am I being unreasonable? Flame away, my friends, flame away.

OMG I am SO MAD at my roommate.

She gave me a cheque to cover internet and the stupid thing bounced and I was charged for it!

She’s bounced cheques twice before with our landlady and this really bothers me, I’m worried that she won’t be able to afford rent or anything else pretty soon. SO PISSED.

Not to mention that she’s been eating all my food and not replacing it!

*fury*

And I suck at confrontation. When you have to live with someone it’s hard to confront them about these things and keep a harmonious environment. I really just need to live on my own because this really gets under my skin.

She’s a nice girl, older than me, but NOT RESPONSIBLE!!!

arrrhggghghhghghg!
RANTRANTRANTRANTRANT!!! Dammit!

I sent her a text saying it bounced and that I need the money plus the admin fee back. Let’s hope that she doesn’t have a problem with this and can just give it to me. But still, I don’t want her to be nonchalant about it either, for chrissakes. This sort of thing should not be happening!

I hate being tied to people who are not financially responsible and having to rely on them like this. If she doesn’t pay things like rent, it affects me! It’s all rainbows and sunshine with just me, but having to share with others sucks!

Why me?!