Category Archives: rant

#FatPeopleAreSexier

There’s a huge bru-ha-ha going on over in Twitterland over the top trending topic of the day, #fatpeoplearesexier.

I’ve seen some people in my feed making comments about it in a negative fashion, as if you can’t be sexy and fat at the same time, or that being fat automatically means that you can’t be healthy.

This obviously upsets me because (in case you haven’t figured it out by reading my blog)

I AM FAT.

And sexy.

And healthy.

The terms are not mutually exclusive. You can be all of the above, all at the same time.

It upsets me that people who “know” me online are making comments, forgetting the fact that fat people (and sometimes their fat friends) are reading those comments, and are being offended by this whole thing.

There is such a thing as health at every size, my friends. Just because you’re thin doesn’t mean you’re healthy OR sexy by default.

I happen to be fat, yet I take care of myself. I get regular exercise, I eat healthy and in moderation and I dress myself well, do my hair, etc. Just like everyone else.

But I’m still fat. Sure, I could do more (and I will) because I would like to be a smaller size, but as it stands, my doc thinks I’m healthy, I think I’m sexy, and so do all the guys who follow after me when I go out!

I would like to direct your attention to the following points [via Kate Harding’s Shapely Prose] to help you better understand obesity, being fat, and BEING HUMAN:

1. Weight itself is not a health problem, except in the most extreme cases (i.e., being underweight or so fat you’re immobilized). In fact, fat people live longer than thin people and are more likely to survive cardiac events, and some studies have shown that fat can protect against “infections, cancer, lung disease, heart disease, osteoporosis, anemia, high blood pressure, rheumatoid arthritis and type 2 diabetes.” Yeah, you read that right: even the goddamned diabetes. Now, I’m not saying we should all go out and get fat for our health (which we wouldn’t be able to do anyway, because no one knows how to make a naturally thin person fat any more than they know how to make a naturally fat person thin; see point 4), but I’m definitely saying obesity research is turning up surprising information all the time — much of which goes ignored by the media — and people who give a damn about critical thinking would be foolish to accept the party line on fat. Just because you’ve heard over and over and over that fat! kills! doesn’t mean it’s true. It just means that people in this culture really love saying it.

2. Poor nutrition and a sedentary lifestyle do cause health problems, in people of all sizes. This is why it’s so fucking crucial to separate the concept of “obesity” from “eating crap and not exercising.” The two are simply not synonymous — not even close — and it’s not only incredibly offensive but dangerous for thin people to keep pretending that they are. There are thin people who eat crap and don’t exercise — and are thus putting their health at risk — and there are fat people who treat their bodies very well but remain fat. Really truly.

3. What’s more, those groups do not represent anomalies; no one has proven that fat people generally eat more or exercise less than thin people. Period. And believe me, they’ve tried. (Gina Kolata’s new book, Rethinking Thin, is an outstanding source for more on that point.)

4. Diets don’t work. No, really, not even if you don’t call them diets. If you want to tell me about how YOUR diet totally worked, do me a favor and wait until you’ve kept all the weight off for five years. Not one year, not four years, five years. And if you’ve kept it off for that long, congratulations. You’re literally a freak of nature.

5. Given that diets don’t work in the long-term for the vast, vast majority of people, even if obesity in and of itself were a health crisis, how the fuck would you propose we solve it?

6. Most fat people have already dieted repeatedly. And sadly, it’s likely that the dieting will cause them more health problems than the fat.

7. Human beings deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. Fat people are human beings.

8. Even fat people who are unhealthy still deserve dignity and respect. Still human beings. See how that works?

9. In any case, shaming teh fatties for being “unhealthy” doesn’t fucking help. If shame made people thin, there wouldn’t be a fat person in this country, trust me. I wish I could remember who said this, ’cause it’s one of my favorite quotes of all time: “You cannot hate people for their own good.”

10. If you scratch an article on the obesity! crisis! you will almost always find a press release from a company that’s developing a weight loss drug — or from a “research group” that’s funded by such companies.

There. Now that you’ve read that you’ve been given the opportunity to be a MUCH nicer person.

Some people think that #fatpeoplearesexier. Just to clear this up, I don’t necessarily believe that. I feel that #fatpeoplearesexy is a better descriptor.

Feel free to hash this out in the comments. You all know how I feel now. Just remember, this fat chick is watching what you write, so be smart.

On the subject of online dating

Yes, I have tried it.

For some reason, I continue to try it.
Have I had any luck with it?
Nope.
I really don’t know why I keep going back. Maybe it’s the messages I sometimes receive… they can certainly boost one’s ego now and then.
But most of the time the messages are short and stupid, to the tune of:
“hey how r u”
“your cute”
And so forth. 99.9% of the time they’re from guys I am not interested in at all, and with the types of mind-blowing messages like those above; they are a complete waste of time.
On the few occasions where I have found someone suitable and given them a chance with my MSN, it has also been a giant FAIL. I need a Fail Whale of epic proportions to adequately represent these “boys”.
No one can carry a conversation; they can’t go 3 sentences without putting some stupid sex reference in, or, if they actually seem to be alright, they turn into pussies when I ask them if they’d like to meet for coffee and find a million excuses not to come.
Or they just plain old don’t show up at all.
Folks, just because it’s the internet does not mean I am not a real person. I have feelings, you know.
This all just leads to further frustration on my part. I fall off the horse and I get back on, but the Universe doesn’t seem to want to give me a break.
I’ve been on just about every popular dating site out there. Hey, let’s play a game! How many dating sites has Ginger been on, that she remembers off the top of her head?
  • Lavalife
  • POF
  • OkCupid
  • Match
  • Lemontonic
  • eHarmony
  • TangoWire
And those are just the ones I can think of right away. I’m sure there’s more. Spread a wide net, ya dig?
The worst part of online dating which actually just occured today was the fact that sometimes, you run into people you ACTUALLY KNOW.
The horror!
For some reason today I logged into OkCupid. I don’t really use this site because again: the pussy factor.
Anyway, what do I find in my inbox?
A message from a guy I know who is dating one of my friends. He just broke off an engagement with another friend of mine in favour of the one he is dating right now. I don’t particularly like this guy, but for some reason he is trying to curry favour with me. I don’t know why he cares about my opinion. It’s too much drama for me to handle.
Apparently I showed up in his “quiver”, which means the computer thought we would be a good match based on a series of questions we answered. How embarrassing.
I remarked to him that it was odd that we would be matched together. Then I asked him if my friend knew he was on this site looking for sex hookups (oh YES, ladies! That is what was in his profile!!!!!).
We’ll see how he answers that.
And yes, I’m totally living the dramz lately, aren’t I? I think someone should hook me up with a reality TV show. FOX, I’m looking at you.

So yeah, I’m kind of bitter about the online dating thing. It never seems to work out. My failure in dating in general is compounded by the failure of the internet.

I have TRIED.

But I just can’t get a break. Maybe you see my pain now.

Pissed and Put-Out

I just had a friend call me at 10pm asking to crash at my place. It seems she was caught in between moving in and out of an apartment. She was going to stay with her sister but her sister cancelled….

Ok I’m really pissed about this and just had a convo with another friend who doesn’t know her. It sums things up pretty well so you’ll have to suffer with a pasted convo:

Friend says:
Hey. How was your day yesterday?
Ginger says:
it was ok
im kind of pissed right now though
a friend just asked to crash at my place
she didn’t have anywhere else to go tonight, so i said yes
F says:
Damn, that sucks
G says:
i told her to get here before 11pm so i could settle her in
and i went and pulled out all the freaking stuff in the guest room, made her bed, etc
and she’s at a club downtown right now.
it was 1030 by this point after i’ve been cleaning very quietly
F says:
Ugh..
G says:
and i txt her asking her to be here soon
and she fuckin’ txts me back saying she can’t leave right now
her party is more important than a place to stay tonight!?!?!?
so she basically says she won’t be coming anymore
so pissed. i am so put out right now. i went to all that trouble at the last minute for her
and now she’s not even coming. what am i, a hotel?
i really don’t mind helping people out, but fucking follow through, eh?
F says:
I don’t blame you one bit
G says:
i just can’t believe she would ask me a big favour like that and then make me go to the trouble, then not even come!
seriously!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!eleventyone!11!!!!
F says:
So beat her with a nerf bat when you see her next
G says:
urgh
seriously, i don’t mind helping but i HATE being taken advantage of
F says:
That’s because you’re so awesome. So when you’re put out like this, you get super pissed
G says:
yeah no kidding.
i used to be such a doormat. i believe in helping others, but sometimes it makes it worse for me
now she’s changed her mind and has said she’ll come and is offering to make me breakfast
i’m not even here for breakfast
*big sigh*
i don’t know what to do
—————–

Still upset. She keeps waffling back and forth about coming, and it seems to me her glass of wine is more important than her friend that just went the extra mile for her benefit. I’m not letting her come over now.

What I really want to do later is call her and yell at her a little. Tell her that I feel really taken advantage of by her and that she needs to shape up or ship out. I like her and don’t mind helping her, but there has to be some gratitude and respect in there somewhere, and I ain’t feelin’ it.

Am I being unreasonable? Flame away, my friends, flame away.

grrrr

OMG I am SO MAD at my roommate.

She gave me a cheque to cover internet and the stupid thing bounced and I was charged for it!

She’s bounced cheques twice before with our landlady and this really bothers me, I’m worried that she won’t be able to afford rent or anything else pretty soon. SO PISSED.

Not to mention that she’s been eating all my food and not replacing it!

*fury*

And I suck at confrontation. When you have to live with someone it’s hard to confront them about these things and keep a harmonious environment. I really just need to live on my own because this really gets under my skin.

She’s a nice girl, older than me, but NOT RESPONSIBLE!!!

arrrhggghghhghghg!
RANTRANTRANTRANTRANT!!! Dammit!

I sent her a text saying it bounced and that I need the money plus the admin fee back. Let’s hope that she doesn’t have a problem with this and can just give it to me. But still, I don’t want her to be nonchalant about it either, for chrissakes. This sort of thing should not be happening!

I hate being tied to people who are not financially responsible and having to rely on them like this. If she doesn’t pay things like rent, it affects me! It’s all rainbows and sunshine with just me, but having to share with others sucks!

Why me?!