Ok there has been some major drama going on at my place lately between me and my roommate.
She’s just too immature, self-centered and irresponsible for me to live with much longer. She doesn’t clean anything (I take care of 95% of the work around the house on a regular basis) and then complains the single time I don’t take the garbage out to her liking. She talks to me in a condescending way and tries to make me feel bad.
She uses my things without asking and takes advantage of me and my generous nature in numerous ways. She even makes me take care of her when she’s sick and give her MY medicine! She always wants to split costs “to be fair”, but only when it suits her. She’s currently pulling that stunt with my BBQ tank and I’m pretty pissed off.
Anyway, there has been tension for a while. On Friday we had a rather nasty text message exchange (initiated by her because she can’t be bothered to speak to someone in person) which just sort of pushed me over the edge…
Since I’ve been on my antidepressants I’ve been growing my spine back. When she started living here I would let her walk all over me and bottle everything up. Now I’m starting to crack. I think she is noticing the difference and not liking it. I’m standing up for myself more and not taking as much of her shit.
Anyway, I spent the whole weekend furious over her and the whole situation (despite best efforts of myself and my bff to keep my mind off things). I’ve got a lot of pent up things I want to say to her and have been planning it since Sunday, but we have yet to cross paths at home.
Among the things I wanted to say was that she needs to either shape up or ship out. I’m tired of her attitude and irresponsibility. Tired of everything.
Rather than kicking her out right away (as my friends suggest) I was planning to let her stay if she could shape up… While regularly I wouldn’t need her half of the rent to carry my apartment, for the next few months having it would be much easier… I have to start repaying my surgery loan from my Granny which will be a big chunk of my budget (28% to be exact!) every month.
She did send me an “apology” email, but I don’t believe it’s very sincere. I didn’t really reply to it other than to ask if she was home soon so we could talk. Here it is for your viewing pleasure:
“Hey, I wanted to talk to you tonight. I just wanted to say sorry about Friday. I feel pretty bad about it, and the whole spiel was entirely unnecessary. I feel crummy. Don’t want any bad blood between us. I could be more understanding, and I’m working on it. We live together, being in harmony is a way better option than being hostile and tense all over. I want things to be good between us, and I apologize.
And I hope you have a stellar week next week.”
Now, for the twist
My roommate wrote a cryptic status update on her Facebook wall this morning, then followed it up with a comment in another language. I translated this comment and discovered that she’s planning to move out in Feb and hasn’t even told me yet!
This is a huge complication for me!
Here is what she wrote:
Roommate: yes, the eclipse is working its lunar magic. And I’ve made a decision.
Friend: an eclipse today or yesterday?
Roommate: already been! sorry, I’ll write about Berlin. I first wrote the e-mail with people to make reservations. I need to ask your advice about Apartments in the room or I’ll rentovat. you just can stay with me, and then we shall understand how much to pay. All write! I’ve got a crisis now – I’m trying to decide whether to move to my new Apartment in February or not. I think so. Have you ever moved in the winter?
At this point I don’t really know what to do. We have agreed to meet in person at home on Wednesday evening to sort things out between us, but I don’t know how to handle this situation.
Do I confront her about wanting to move out? I mean… I DO want her to move out, just not straight away.
Do I start in with a conversation about the lack of work and consideration she has, and then see what she says? (Oh… I’m planning to move out)
Is there a compromise in there somewhere? February is a crappy time to move. I would like rent for a little longer and she would likely want better weather to move. Do I suggest that we agree to live together until March or April, and then split amicably?
WHAT DO I DO???